Should parents be involved in our matchmaking?

REMEMBER this term - parasite singles.
It may haunt you one day, if fewer people in Singapore have babies.
Parasite singles is a term coined by a Japanese professor to refer to older single men and women who are still living with their parents.
The problem is so acute in Japan that fed-up parents have taken over the search for a mate.
Japanese traditionally house and support their children until marriage, which has usually occurred at a younger age than now.
But as the kids stay at home longer due to job uncertainty and an unwillingness to compromise, panicked parents are flocking to mass matchmaking events at hotels and conference centres, reported The Times of India.
Events have been held in 13 cities with around 6,500 participants.
Marriage agency Office Ann organises such an event. This is how it works.
Parents are handed a list of eligible men and women detailing age, background, income and soon.
Guests who like the look of a candidate take along photos and CVs of their offspring to other parents sitting in the same hall.
If the parents click, they exchange information and agree to arrange a meeting between their children.
Then the hard work of playing Cupid to unsuspecting offspring begins. 'Our son doesn't know we're here, but we hope he'll be pleased,' one parent told the Independent.
'He is just too busy to come by himself.'
Ms Saki Kazoo, president of matchmaking firm Marriage Club Wish Oklahoma, told the Independent that the children often know absolutely nothing about these meetings.
She said: 'Parents are so worried about their unmarried offspring that they feel they have to do something.'
Sociologist Masahiro Yamada, who coined the term 'parasite single', said 60 per cent of single Japanese men and 80 per cent of women still live at home and unmarried into their early thirties.
It is one of the highest rates in the world.
Prof Yamada says there are 10 million parasite singles of both sexes in Japan, reported the Independent.
Japan's fertility rate fell to a low of 1.25 in 2005, meaning more people died than were born. Without immigration to offset the shortage, the population of 127 million will halve by the end of the century, the government warned recently.
Lazy children to blame?
Prof Yamada blames the parasite phenomenon on lazy children who grew up in luxury to baby-boomer parents, but the problem is more complex.
Millions of Japanese men in their twenties and thirties toil some of the longest hours in the developed world, then spend most of their weekends sleeping, leaving little time to look for partners. Women, meanwhile, shun marriage to overworked men who are seldom around. In the middle are their worried mums and dads, says Ms Kasai.
'Some people are lucky because they find love by themselves,' she told the Independent.
'Others need a little help, from wherever they can get it. That's what we're here for.'
This article was first published in The New Paper on Aug 26, 2008.