Don't be afraid of rejection

I don't think Singaporean men are afraid of rejection from women. That's right, you read correctly.

But men are afraid of the "embarrassment" that rejection brings. Not the rejection itself.

Bear in mind though, embarrassment is simply a feeling - an emotion.

In some ways, it is a self-manufactured emotion. Now, why do I say so?

If a woman were to turn you down, there is no meaning in the gesture alone.

You will need to draw meaning from that incident, and you will feel emotions arising from the meaning that you have created.

For instance, let's say you go talk to a lady at a cafe. Her body language tells you to leave her alone.

You could take your cue from there and her gestures to mean: "I failed and will never try talking to another girl again."

Or you could think of it this way: "I laugh it off and move on. Approaching strangers is amusing, it is just a way to see who is interested to talk you, and who is not, that's all."

Since embarrassment is an emotion one chooses to feel after a rejection, a neat technique to overcome that is to replace embarrassment with another emotion.

By the way, this is a 'trick' I learnt from the world of combat sports where fighters are taught to convert fear into something else.

There is a range of alternative emotions to choose from.

Should a woman give you an undesired response or 'rejection', instead of the usual embarrassment, you can feel:

- Motivated
- Playful
- Thankful
- Smart-assed
- Delighted by her antics
- Confident

Take your pick.

I know this sounds weird and you may be thinking: "Is this some type of new age mental babble?"

No, it is not.

This case might help illustrate my point.

Take the emotion of feeling 'playful' for instance.

A friend of mine is an expert in that. He once approached a lady at the Mrt station, and she told him: "I don't really feel comfortable chatting with guys who approach me."

Does he go into 'embarrassed' or other negative mode straightaway?

No, he got playful and replied: "You're right. And if there's any guy who does that to you, let me know. I'll teach him a lesson."

She giggled shyly, they chatted, he ended up getting her number. I rest my case.


So, here's a little action step.

Acknowledge that 'embarrassment' (or other anxious emotion) is not the only thing you can feel.

One guy can talk to a woman and is told to stay away and he feels humiliated.

Another guy talks to the same woman and is given the same response by the woman. He feels a bout of delight from her response and laughingly pokes fun at the girl to relax the situation.

I'm sure you've seen men like that.

So, it is a case of similar incident, but choosing to feel differently about your emotions.

Choose one empowering emotion that serves you continuously in your girl-getting adventures.

by Skildo

About the writer:

Skilldo is an 'ex-unhappy' Singaporean guy - who grew from being lonely,
dateless and single... into breaking out of it, and obtained a fulfilling
social life in meeting, dating and entering satisfying relationships with
women.

He is the author of 'The Ultimate Singapore Girl-Getter'. A
locally-focused guide for Singapore men to approach, date and successfully
attract the type of women they want for themselves.

http://www.divaasia.com/article/3748

Looking for a tenant (single christian)preferably working adult in clementi area

I am looking for a tenant (single christian)preferably working adult in clementi area (near MRT with eating places easily avaiable and supermarket). Interested party can contact me either via e-mail CL_Fong @singnet.com.sg or Handphone: 98212936.

God bless you. Regards.

Lai Fong

Global Day of Prayer

Deb Fung Live in Concert

Dear friends,

As a valued subscriber to my meanderings and activities I’d love to give you an early heads up on a special event. For the first time in two years since my Esplanade shows, I’ll be performing in concert in Singapore at a special, intimate venue – you may have heard of it - “Love the World Bistro & Bar” on Wednesday 24th June 09. Tickets will be $42 which includes a buffet dinner and *complimentary drink.

However! For a very limited time before word gets out, I can arrange the special subscribers price of $38! The tickets go public on the 24th May at the official price so hurry, secure your spot and order your tickets through the online box office before then!

Deb Fung in Concert
Love the World Bistro & Bar
30 Raffles Avenue
#02-05 Singapore Flyer
Wednesday 24th June, 2009
Dining from 7.30pm

Cheers!

Deb xx

PURCHASE TICKETS NOW!
www.debfung.com
Forward to friends to share this exclusive offer with them!

* Complimentary drink available only for tickets purchased before 11:59pm 17th June, 2009.

This email was sent by Deb Fung, info@monsoonproductions.com.au

--
CSMusic
www.csmusic.sg
info@csmusic.sg

Paint-A-Home Project for Pertapis Children's Home (Kovan) (For Single Christian)

The details are:

13 June 2009 (Sat)
All day event from morning
Paint-A-Home Project for Pertapis Children's Home (Kovan)
Closing Date: 29 May 2009 (Fri)
Contact: cytaylm@gmail.com

31 May event: Keen to learn more about God's creation and Darwinism? (For Single Christian Only)

Dear all,

Keen to learn more about God's creation and Darwinism? Come to the evening service of Calvary Pandan Bible-Presbyterian Church on 31 May (Sunday). Dr Carl Wieland, MD of Creation Ministries International (CMI) will be speaking on "God, Darwin and Creation". There will also be a free screening of CMI's million dollar documentary on Charles Darwin, "The Voyage that Shook the World". Read more about the film here: http://creation.com/cmis-year-of-darwin-documentary

Date: 31 May 2009 (Sunday)

Venue: Calvary Pandan Bible-Presbyterian Church, level 2 Main Sanctuary (Address: 201 Pandan Gardens)

Time: 5 to about 7 pm (the 52-minute movie starts around 5 pm)

Dinner: Coupons ($2) can be purchased outside the sanctuary up till 5 pm.

Bring unbelieving friends/relatives.

If going by MRT, alight at Jurong East station and take from Jurong East bus interchange Bus 51, 78, 79 or 143 and alight at the bus stop just after Jurong Town Hall/Jln Ahmad Ibrahim junction & AYE flyover (5th or 6th stop from interchange depending on the service), i.e. bus stop B shown in the map. Walk thru small grey gate at the bus stop to the church (the beige/light brown building next to Galilee BP Church).

Still not sure or prefer to go as a group? Then please email me at kamluen2000@yahoo.com latest by Thursday (28 May) with your name and mobile number.

Additional Information:

Catch a 3 min movie trailer and get more info abt Creation Ministries here: http://creation.com/

You can find Dr Wieland's CV here: http://creation.com/dr-carl-wieland

Raffles Museum of Biodiversity Research Houses-24 May (For Single Christian)

Free Admission
24 May, 10 am–5 pm
Gallery Tour: 10 am, 12 noon, 2 pm and 4 pm
Archive Tour: 11 am, 1 pm and 3 pm
(Limited to 20 persons per tour)
Department of Biological Sciences
6 Science Drive 2, #03-01
Faculty of Science
National University of Singapore
Singapore 117546


A hidden gem at the National University of Singapore, the Raffles Museum of Biodiversity Research houses more than 500,000 animals and plant specimens that you can get up close with. Children can marvel at spectacular animals ranging from dugongs, a two-metre tortoise, tigers, bats and more. They can also have fun competing against one another in animal-themed giant puzzles and paper craft stations. Don't forget to take this chance to join an exclusive tour of the museum’s three-storey archive section that is rarely opened for public viewing.

Meeting Place: Buona Vista MRT
Time: 2:00pm

Shuttle bus service from Buona Vista MRT Station to Raffles Museum is available every 30 minutes from 9.45 am to 4.15 pm (except at 12.45 pm). Bus pick up point is at the bus stop along North Buona Vista Road, where the MOE building is located.

Please ask those interested people to send me their names, church attending, email add & h/p# via email: eventfsc@hotmail.com
Open to single Christians only.

Trip to Kyushu (For Single Christians Only)

Hi all,

I will be organising a trip to Kyushu (Japan's most southern island) for 9 days & 8 nights from 8-16 Aug and I will therefore need you to help me broadcast this trip in the general event bulletin.

The cost of the trip is around $2,800 excluding airport/fuel surcharge. (surcharge TBA closer to departure date). The cost will include the following:
(1) Full sightseeing Itinerary
(2) Meals as specified
(3) Hotel
(4) Tour leader, tour guide & driver
(5) Transportation
(5) Airfare
(6) Group insurance

Attached below is the itinerary.(Portion)

Fukuoka
Nagasaki
Kumamoto
Kagoshima
Mt Aso/Beppu

(Full itenaerary will be provided upon request.)

I need 20 brothers & 19 sisters to fill up the entire coach. The closing date for registration is 17 June or until the max no of pax is attained.

Attached above is the itinerary. Please ask those interested people to send me their names, church attending, email add & h/p# via email: limgloria@hotmail.com
FYI this tour is strictly open to single Christians only.

Thanks

To: Franky,

>Can you help me to broadcast those brothers and sisters who are interested to get the travel insurance for the trip to

>Kyushu. I will give some discount to Christian only.

>Thanks

>Regards

>Serene Oh

>H/P: 98783099

Project SOL

Hi All,

2 to 2.5hrs Focus Group Discussion on Financial
Venue : River Valley Rd
Incentive : $120

Date between now till 25th May 2009 (Actual date to be confirmed)
Time at 6.30pm

Singaporean or PR age 21 to 59 yrs old

Gp 1 - Active Overdraft / Person Line of Credit User

Gp 2 - Past Overdraft Users / Card Revolvers

Gp 3 - Use Installment plan from Courts, Harvey Norman, GE Money, etc.

All must not have family member or themselves working in Sensitive Industry
I.e. Bank, Financial Institution, Media Corp, Journalism, Journalism, etc
Anyone keen, pls reply me ASAP with these details.
Race :
Gender:
Name:
Age
NRIC:
Marital Status: S-Single / MNK-Married No Kid / MWK-Married with Kid ?
Edu Level:
Occupation:
a) Office Tel:
b) Handphone?
Annual Income ?
Main Bank ?

For each bank, pls indicate what products and services you use.
You can indicate more than 1 service / product.
[C] Chequing account [L] LOANS
[S] Savings Account [UT] UNIT TRUSTS
[CUR] Current Account [CL] Credit line/revolving credit
[INV] Other Investment Product [CC] Credit Card
A) Citi Bank ?
B) UOB?
C) POSB/DBS?
D) HSBC?
E) OCBC?
F) SCB?

Pls indicate - 1 / 2a / 2b / 2c / 2d ?
1) Revolvers ?
2) Installments with (a) Bank, (b) GE Money, (c) Courts, (d) Harvey Norman ?

Kindly provide the details if keen and email to angeline@kaf.com.sg

Thanks & Regards
Angeline

23 May 2009 Saturday (SFG EVENT, FOR SINGLE CHRISTIAN ONLY)

Welcome Home to Singles Focus Group GUYS * GALS ! NITE
Dinner Fellowship & Sharing ... Understanding the Opposite Views
6pm - 10pm
Venue: Café Daily Bread
Anglo Chinese School, 60 Barker Rd (Near Newton MRT)
SPORTS COMPLEX LEVEL 3
Come and hear singles share on how man and woman differ in their thoughts and actions ….. about relationships, fear of commitment, waiting for the ideal and finding fulfillment in life.
Refer to www.singlesfocusgroup.org for more details.

Please drop Seok Ai a line at seokai@singlesfocusgroup.org to say you are coming.

13May09 (Mid-week Christian Dinner at Suntec City) (For Single Christian only)

Hi all,
Please join us for a mid-week Christian outing after a long day work
fellowshipping with a group of already known and some new faces
we have not seen before.

It is good to see some christians meeting together for a simple dinner.

This outing is strictly open for Christian Only.

Outing: Christian Dinner
* Venue: Dinner at Suntec Basement One Just Noodle
* Date: Wed 13 May'09
* Time: 7pm-10pm
* Meet: 7pm outside Just Noodle Restaurant
* Cost: At Own Cost (Pay your own meal)
* Target Size : 20 people or more

http://www.hungrygowhere.com/singapore/just_noodles_suntec_city/

Address:
3 Temasek Boulevard
#B1-057 Suntec City Mall
Tel: 6336 6455

Cuisine:
Asian, Korean
Specialty:
Wanton Noodles, Curry Chicken Noodles,Deep Fried Pork Donburi
Average price:
approx. S$ 6-10 with free flow of ice-cream/drinks

Interested participants, please reply:
------------ --------- --------- -----
Please indicate
Your Name :
Gender :
Contact no. :
Email address:
Friends (Any):
------------ --------- --------- -----

Best Regards,
Wilfred Wong
H/P#94884478

Wine and Cheese Event 15/05/09 (For Single Christian)

Badminton at Republic Polytechnic NEXT Sunday (17/May) 330-530pm(For Single Christian Only)

We have booked 3 Badminton courts and 1 table tennis court at Republic Polytechnic (RP) on 17/May 330-530pm. Anyone who are keen to play may join us.

Meeting Place : 3pm sharp at Woodlands MRT control station
RP is about 15-20min walk from Woodlands MRT. If you wish to go on your own, we will see you at the Sports Complex. You may also take bus no. 169 from Woodlands bus terminal and its only one stop after the bus turn right and stops in front of RP.

Things to bring : racket + water + Table Tennis bats + ping pong balls
Shuttle cocks will be provided at a minimal cost.

If you drive and are ready to pick some of us up at Woodlands MRT, pls let me know in advance. Your kindness is appreciated.

After the game, we will most likely proceed to Causeway Point Foodcourt for dinner.
We will be glad if you can join us.

If you are confirm coming, pls send a email directly to me at lstspore@yahoo.com (pls do not send to Franky) with yr name, church attending and hp no. We will close once we have gathered enough people for the game. Once you have signed up, I will appreciate your attendance rain or shine. Your co-operation is much appreciated inorder for us to plan for future games. Have a great week ahead !

In His Service
Tina Lee

Choosing the Right Partner (Part E)

http://www.harvesttimes.com.sg/Flipbook.aspx?content=Eng (Pg 16, Part E)